Thursday, April 1, 2010

Mailbag

Oh my! Here's what was in my in-box today!


Dear Sierra,

We noticed you have a wonderful blog, and you post frequently to it with topics that your commenters appear to find somewhat interesting. And they are -- except that you rarely reach double digit comments, and your follower count seems to be far lower than other equivalent blogs. Still, we liked your red theme. And, as we are a full-service literary agency representing women's fiction with numerous best sellers and a track record of scoring our authors 7-figure advances, even (and especially) for debuts, we have decided to reach out to you based on the fact that you seem reasonable, and also because you're a Hibs fan. You've hinted enough about your novels, both the one set in Greece, and the one you're writing now, and we all thought those hints sounded decent enough. In fact, I'd go so far as to say please send pages at once. That's right, I'm requesting a full, now, of everything you've got. My personal email is [redacted]; please send me an attachment there in order to bypass the slush. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. (We'll get you way more than $200!)

I'll tell you what else: your list of internet BFFs is impressive, as well as the fact that you've already got a nemesis, a secret lover, secret husbands, and a torrid affair. Damn, girl. Either you get around, or you're super cool. I'm just going to go ahead and say it...I'm ready to offer you representation. I know a star when I see it.

Now, I know this sounds all a little fantastical and unorthodox. And it is. That's why I'm going to go ahead and say April Fool's right now, but tell you this: persevere. And keep your head up. And keep laughing. Cause you'll get there. Soon.

Sincerely,
[Redacted], at [Redacted] Literary Agency

P.S. I'd like to be added to your BFF list, and possibly start a new category of our own: the April-Fool's Agent. La la la!

18 comments:

Simon C. Larter said...

That's rather an evil thing to do for April Fool's. Why did I not think of it?

Matt said...

HaHaHaHa! How funny was that. I actually bought it til about halfway through. And I thought I was one of your cool blog friends until the April Fool part.

Nuts.

Yvonne said...

I was totally hoodwinked til around the Hibs sentence. Ha! April Fools to you too Sierra! I LOVE your Noxious theme from yesterday and your red bloggy too!!
And by the way, you have more followers than I do. Boo Hoo

Lt. Cccyxx said...

That's right, I'm requesting a full, now, of everything you've got.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!

(you kind of had me until the mention of 7-figure advances, actually)

And followers don't account for all the folks who just add you to their feeds without following!

Julie Dao said...

HAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAAHAH

atsiko said...

Hilarious, Sierra. I got half-way through before I thought... "Hmm, this is April 1st, isn't it?"

Sierra Godfrey said...

Hey, dreams come true, I've heard :)

Happy April, loveys.

Dawn Hullender said...

Shit, I actually was feeling kinda jealous. That was a mean joke to play. Funny as hell, but still mean.

Dawn Simon said...

Hee! Though I agree: persevere and keep your head up! :) Happy April, Sierra!

Alicia J. Frey said...

LOL!! This is great. Just send it all.

Amber Tidd Murphy said...

Seriously. You had me going for a minute.

But it's been a long day. :)

Roni @ FictionGroupie said...

LMAO, too funny.

DL Hammons said...

Whoever was behind it blew it when they mentioned seven-digit advances. Yeah right!!

(Watch...someday Sierra will land a seven-digit advance). :)

Jm Diaz said...

Awesome!

T.J. Carson said...

Haha that was funny and kinda cruel. lol but a good April' Fools prank!!!!!!!!!!

Cynthia Reese said...

Hey ... YOU WILL GET THERE. You will. No April Foolin' at all!

Sierra Godfrey said...

Thanks guys, glad you liked it. Thanks for commenting and welcome TJ and Cynthia!

You heard it here first guys, DL Hammons says I'll get a seven figure advance.

Natalie Murphy said...

LMFAO!

Ahh, alas, no spewage today darling. Maybe tomorrow? ;)

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