dropping off the whippersnapper at school. I had Rainbow Puppy in a baby pack, wearing him in front of me, and I entered a crosswalk. This car comes shooting down to the stop sign at the crosswalk, and rolls right through while I'm still in the crosswalk--in fact, barely half way across.
I turned and give the driver A Look.
The driver stopped the car, just past the crosswalk. She rolled down her window and asked,"Do you want to share about that?"
Oooh. I bleeping HATE it when people talk like that. Did I want to share my feelings, as though we were in group therapy and not me nearly being hit in a crosswalk by a driver who couldn't stop at a stop sign? Did I want to communicate my anger, and presumably talk about it in a rational way? Did I want to share like it was show and tell day in Kindergarten?
You bet I did.
"Yes, I want to share," I said. "Why don't you not go through crosswalks while people with babies are still in them?"
She didn't miss a beat. "I can tell by the look on your face that you're not happy with that. Would it make you feel better if I waited here til you're on the sidewalk?" This last was delivered in a SUPER patronizing tone, as though I was the asshole.
"No," I said. "What would make me feel better is if you actually stopped at stop signs, especially when people with babies are in the crosswalks."
She smiled a frosty little smile. I could tell she was trying to do one of those happy-bright-positive things, but it wasn't working because of the way she'd opened with the confrontational inquiry as to whether I wanted to share. And she'd probably ruined any possibility of any goodnaturedness when she'd chosen to roll through the crosswalk with me still in it. She said, "I'm sorry you felt angry. I'll try to remember to stop."
"That would be great," I said. "Have a nice day."
None of the above was said with any sincerity. We were two mean bitches, angry at each other and full of morning vigor. Although she was clearly in the wrong, and she was condescending and rude when she had no place to be, I was mad and righteous about it.
When she drove off, I was still angry. I didn't expect to be nearly run over and then confronted about it. She probably didn't expect (or like) being called out on bad behavior, and chose to confront me about it rather than apologize and move on.
Man, what a way to begin the holiday season!
We're all rushing these days and especially now up til Christmas. Here are a few reminders on navigating the season:
- Please, please take a moment to slow down. Hurrying causes accidents.
- Be courteous. Say you're sorry when you bump or transgress, and say excuse me.
- When someone else pushes or bumps, try to restrain yourself from lashing out. Move on.
- Have a hot cup of coffee and be glad you're alive and (I hope) healthy.
- Don't ask people if they want to share. It's gross and smarmy.
Have a good week. And for goodness' sake don't ask people to share.