Monday, May 14, 2012

The problem with having parents who are writers

Not my kid. But face was the same.
Over the weekend we were all driving somewhere* and my 5 year old whippersnapper was in the back looking through the best backseat entertainment ever for 5 year olds: a toy figurine catalog. He was oooing and ahhing over various dragon and knight stuff and every time he'd see something new he'd say "Oh man this is awesome!"  "Oooh, this is awesome!"  "Oh my God! This is awesome!"

*somewhere = shopping for Mommy. 

After about the third or fourth awesome, the thesaurus installed in my brain clicked into overdrive. "You know," I suggested, "Maybe it's not just awesome, but it's sensational."

He said nothing, but his face in the rear view mirror had him looking like he'd smelled one his baby brother's diaper bombs.

After a moment, he resumed his regular "awesome" programming.

"Oooh!" I interrupted. "It's radical!"

"Stop it, Mommy," he said.

"OMG! It's top notch! Really quite amazing!"

"Stop it."

"This is excellent!"

"Stop it."

"Amazing. Fabuloso. Tremendous!"

"Stop it, Mommy!"

"Splendid!"

"Stop!"

"Breathtaking!"

"Stop!"

"Magnificent!"

"Stop!"

"Spectacular!"

"Stop!"

 "Brilliant!"

"Stopppppppppppppppp!"

"Marvelous!"

"Stooooooopppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp!!"

I giggled and he fumed and I let all those synonyms sit with him as we passed the next few miles down the freeway in silence.

And then from the backseat, "Oh wow. This is awesome!"

You might think at this point that I would laugh indulgently and give in and let him have his awesomes, but you'd be thinking wrong. In fact you probably don't think that, because you are a writer too, so you understand that not only did I not give in, but I repeated the litany of very thoughtfully suggested alternatives to the pedestrian "awesome."

Because that's how we roll.



7 comments:

Steven J. Wangsness said...

Ha ha! Great story. It was awesome!

Meghan Ward said...

Ha! I wonder if he'll randomly busting out with "sensational" and "excellent" from now on. And "Brilliant" is a must in your family with all your Britishisms you use in your writing!

Kristen Lippert-Martin said...

I am familiar with the lack of appreciation from child units as regards my large and impressive vocabulary.

Some of my best lines go completely to waste with these kids. Sheesh.

Sierra Godfrey said...

Thanks guys. One I forgot that I should have used then was "capital." I used that on him today and he wasn't amused. That kid has lost his sense of humor, I can't understand it.

Cathryn Leigh said...

Oh my gooses! I must remember this trick. Daddy isn't a writer, but I bet he'd get in on this (and probably have more fun than me! *giggles*

(I told my son the otherday he needed to stop being insubordinant, he's four and a half.)

Sierra Godfrey said...

Cathryn, insubordinate is a great term! I love it!

Cathryn Leigh said...

Thanks! *grins* It suspect it's the military upbrining, but I get tired of saying 'why don't you listen and do as your told' over and over again. :}

Someday our kids might thank us for giving them such large vocabularies.

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