As I wheeled the kid out in his stroller, struggling and cajoling him to keep his remaining shoe on, I found myself checking furtively over my shoulder to see if any store employees would tackle me. You see, I had been a bit badly behaved.
Naturally, none of it was my fault. And upon reflection, it's the stuff I do almost every time I'm in there.
First, I was waylaid and detained by the New Fiction shelf. Surreptitiously, I pulled out my phone, shooting the baby a look to keep his yap shut about this. *Snap!* *Snap!* Yes, I took pictures of the covers so I could download them later on my Kindle. I committed the most egregious sin to bookstores everywhere. (Henceforth to be referred to as Bookstore Sin #1.) But the thing is, the covers are gorgeous! And I simply can't read hardbacks in print anymore! But Mein Gott, what a lovely bunch of cover art that's being produced these days! Look at this!
And to close up, here's what I was in design raptures about:
That is so cool, I totally judged it by its cover art and am going to read it. Then I'll be reading this one:
Here's a gorgeous use of typography on a cover, although I don't think I'll read this one--historical novels are not my cup of tea:
Alas, I didn't get more photos because an employee walked by. So I scurried away to hide among the fiction aisles. There, I committed Bookstore Sin #2. I used my superior powers of alphabetization and made a spade where my own book will go once it is published. That's right. I shoved Gail Godwin aside and a slim Goethe volume (which completely didn't belong there) and made room on the shelf for myself. I should have taken a picture, but the picture author Linda Godfrey took a few years ago on my behalf using a Chinese take-out menu will have to suffice:
That accomplished, I moved on to the Romance section, where I like to commit Bookstore Sin #3: checking for the published copies of my friends and acquaintances. This isn't a sin, no, you're right. But I am not a huge category romance reader so going over there with the sole intent of checking seemed wrong. Plus, one time I did it with my 6 year old whippersnapper in tow and he was all, "oooohhhh" when he spied some overflowing bodices and bosoms on the covers.
Anyway, I found Roni Loren's latest novel out, facing out on the shelf in the New section, no less!
I didn't want to commit Bookstore Sin #4, which is my baby chewing the toddler books with abandon, so we made our purchases and got out of there before further offense could be made.
How about you? What naughty things do you do in bookstores? And I don't mean having sex in the back corner next to the SAT guides, either.